Fake Friendly Fridays is a section where we pick a famous personality and throw fake questions at him/her and in return, we receive fake answers. Why should you not take it seriously? Because it is fake.
If you still didn’t get it: This is a fake interview written purely on the basis of the author’s imagination of how the actual interview would have been if we got the chance to interview these famous (some, for all the wrong reasons) personalities in real life. In short, just have a good laugh!
ED Times (cheerfully): Let us give a big round of applause for the very talented businessman, Elon Musk!!!!! (Says in a low voice) whose business is now in danger.
Audience laughs as Elon Musk enters the stage
Elon Musk: Thank you ED Times and the wonderful audience for an enthusiastic welcome.
ED Times: Thank you Mr. Musk for taking out time from your very busy schedule of managing a business crisis (hinting at Twitter’s fall) and being here.
Elon Musk: (awkward) Business crisis?
ED Times: Well, the entire world knows that Mark Zuckerberg is launching Twitter’s competitor Threads. It had 5 million users within six hours of launch and in 5 days, it surpassed 100 million downloads!!
Elon Musk: Look, competition is healthy, and it’s natural for different platforms to emerge. Threads may offer a different experience, but Twitter has a large and engaged user base.
ED Times: Umm, not to create panic, but Twitter has 250 million active users. In case Threads continue to be popular, it can have 250 million users in a matter of just 10 days.
Elon Musk: Well, we are not afraid! (smiles awkwardly)
ED Times: Not afraid? But you have blocked the links to Threads on Twitter clearly signaling you are afraid that it might engulf the Twitter platform.
Elon Musk: (silence) Well, all I can say is that we will continue to innovate and improve our platform to meet the evolving needs of our users.
ED Times: Oh, innovate the application by limiting its features Twitter?
Awkward silence engulfs the studio.
ED Times: Well, you have limited the number of posts a user can read at once, you are charging users, one can buy the Twitter verified badge. The app has changed a lot.
Elon Musk: Yes, the application has changed for the good. This has only been done for the users.
ED Times: Well, I guess the Twitter audience is frustrated with the limitations that you have put up and hence they are shifting to Threads.
Elon Musk: Threads is Twitter only, but with a different name and a different CEO.
ED Times: And it has features that Twitter has curbed. By the way, we heard you are preparing for a cage fight with Mark Zuckerberg. Tell us something about that.
Elon Musk: (Laughs) Oh yes! I am ready for the fight. We both have been indulged in a technological fight for a while now. So I thought of settling the matter in the most civilized manner possible—inside a cage!
ED Times: Can you tell us about your training regimen for this fight?
Elon Musk: You’d never believe it! I’ve been practicing my movements with my Tesla robot squad, educating them about martial arts. I’ve even built a punching bag on my SpaceX rocket so I can practice my punches while in space.
ED Times: That sounds fascinating! What are you planning to wear for this highly-anticipated cage fight?
Elon Musk: I am planning to incorporate high-tech gadgets to my costumes for the fight. Who said a cage fight can’t be fashionable? I’ve commissioned a team of engineers to develop a state-of-the-art exoskeleton suit for me.
Ed Times: Wonderful! We are waiting! Where can we buy tickets for the cage fight?
Elon Musk: Ah, the tickets! Well, you won’t find them in any ordinary place, my friend. In true Musk fashion, I’ve devised a high-tech way for fans to snag their seats. You’ll need to enter a secret code and unlock a Mars-themed crossword puzzle while riding a self-driving Tesla. Once you crack the code, you’ll be directed to a hidden website where the tickets can be purchased using Dogecoin. It’s gonna be a wild ride, both in and out of the cage!
Interviewer: That’s quite the unique ticketing process, Elon. I can only imagine the excitement among the fans.
ED Times: Mr. Musk, it was great to have you. It is clear that you think of Twitter as the pinnacle of social media. Let’s hope it does not get sidelined by its rival. Also, we can’t wait to see this epic cage fight unfold. Wishing you the best of luck!
Elon Musk: Thank you so much for having me. I am going to set the stage on fire!
ED Times: Ladies and gentlemen, that was Elon Musk, the CEO of Twitter, defending his love, Twitter and facing the heat for the arrival of Threads. Stay tuned for more. And… Buckle up, because the Musk vs. Zuckerberg showdown is coming to a cage near you!
Image Credits: Google Images
Feature image designed by Saudamini Seth
Sources: Blogger’s own imagination
Find the blogger: Palak Dogra
This post is tagged under: elon musk, elon musk twitter, mark zuckerberg, mark zuckerberg threads, Twitter, threads, elon musk vs mark zuckerberg
Disclaimer: We do not hold any right, copyright over any of the images used, these have been taken from Google. In case of credits or removal, the owner may kindly mail us.